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Believe me, I’ve tried them enough times to know that’s the truth. And every time they failed, I felt kind of like a loser. (Of course that never stopped me from trying them again a few months later.)

But then, in 2017, I made a resolution to quit drinking. It took nine months, but it finally stuck. And I started to realize why all those other efforts hadn’t worked.

They were too all or nothing.

I’d be all in for about 14 days, changing everything I did and basically rearranging my whole life. And round about that 15th day (sometimes I made it a little longer…) I’d cheat on my diet, or have a glass [a bottle] of wine, or miss a day of exercise, or [insert behavior I’d vowed to give up here], and then I’d think, well, screw this! Then I’d go right back to how everything was 15 days ago.

They were too future-focused.

Goals are great. But not when they keep your mind disconnected from the day to day. I was thinking too much about the me of tomorrow and not connecting it to what the me of today needed to do to get there.

They were too solo.

You know the power of community. I wasn’t relying on anyone but my own force of will. It only got me so far (about 14 days, apparently).

Everything I’ve done THAT HAS REALLY STUCK (like quitting drinking) hasn’t been the result of a huge, short effort.

It’s been the result of dozens of small and consistent efforts over time.


I’m pitching resolutions, diets, and other silver-bullet plans. I’m reframing them and reinventing them as “won’t give up ons.”

Yeah, it’s super-hokey.

But I’m looking at it like this:

Big changes seem unattainable, but a won’t give up on is just a bunch of little things you do every day.

Lofty goals are things that come true in the future. Won’t give up ons shape what we do today.

Resolutions are staid and old-fashioned. Won’t give up ons are fun and fearless and a little bit silly.

All that other stuff only sticks around a couple weeks. Won’t give up ons are things we won’t give up on. Ever.


Want to make some changes and see some results?

Want to do it together?

Let’s put some won’t give up ons in place right now.


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Still struggling through wine o-clock?

Download my e-book, Walk away from the wine, featuring 13 practices to help you destress without booze.

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You can change how you think.

You don’t have to be stuck in the same old stories.

You can see things in a whole new way.

You can do things you've failed at in the past.

You really are in charge around here.

You can change how you drink.

You can have fun and be happy without booze.

You never have to feel guilty about having too many, ashamed of what you said or texted, or make it through a day hung over again. Ever.

You don’t have to be an “alcoholic” or have a “problem” or a “diagnosis.” If drinking is getting in your way of living, you can start stopping right now.


 Hi! I’m Laura.

I’m a mom, a teetotaler, a writer, a happiness advocate.

Learn more about me here.